What Exactly is Mindfulness Anyway?
How Can Mindfulness Help with Anxiety
Na ji rum ba, na ji rum ba……….Remember that Martin episode, when life got too thick and he ran away, became Bro. Shaquille Sunflower, and the crew found him at that temple to “see the light and get himself right”. LOL
If you are unfamiliar with mindfulness, this is the scene that you might have in your mind. While this episode is HE-LARRY-US…..it’s not exactly what mindfulness is about. Give me a few minutes of your time, and let me break it down for you.
You’ve probably heard people talking about it—especially in relation to stress, anxiety, or mental health. Maybe you've even seen it pop up on your Instagram feed, with influencers meditating on mountain tops or sipping herbal tea. You might have thought, “Is this another wellness trend that will disappear by next year?” Or even thought, “nobody has time for all of that!”
Trust me, you’re not alone. In the fast-paced world we live in—especially if you're balancing career, family, and the other stressors of midlife as a Black Gen X woman—taking time to be mindful can sound like a foreign and impossible task. But check this out: mindfulness isn't just for yogis or zen gurus meditating in caves. It's for all of us, and it can be especially beneficial in managing anxiety and navigating life’s biggest transitions. And believe it or not, it’s not entirely that “woo-woo” thing you pictured in your mind!
So let’s explore:
· what mindfulness really is
· why it matters
· how you can use it to regain control
· how you can use it to reduce anxiety
· how you can use it to set healthy boundaries in your relationships
Ready? Let’s get into it.
Background of Mindfulness
First off, mindfulness isn't new. It has deep roots in ancient Buddhist meditation practices but has evolved into a secular practice over time, especially in the world of modern psychology and wellness. Mindfulness gained popularity in the 1970s thanks to people like Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn, who developed Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR). MBSR brought mindfulness into clinical settings as a way to treat stress, anxiety, and depression.
But at its core, mindfulness is simple: it’s the practice of being fully present and engaged in the current moment, without judgment. It’s about observing your thoughts, feelings, and sensations as they are, without trying to change or suppress them. It sounds simple, but it’s a lot harder than it seems in a world full of distractions, overthinking, and multitasking.
How Does Mindfulness Work?
Mindfulness works by anchoring you in the present moment. Most of our anxiety comes from worrying about the future or ruminating over the past. When you practice mindfulness, you're training your brain to stay grounded in the "now," which helps calm your mind and reduce stress.
Research shows that regular mindfulness practice can actually change the structure of your brain. Studies using MRI scans have shown that people who practice mindfulness have increased gray matter in the brain regions associated with emotional regulation, decision-making, and self-awareness. That means practicing mindfulness isn’t just a mental exercise; it’s a full-on brain workout!
Mindfulness techniques can be as simple as paying attention to your breathing, noticing sensations in your body, or observing your thoughts without getting swept up by them. And no, you don’t have to sit cross-legged or meditate for hours. You can practice mindfulness anytime, anywhere—whether you're stuck in traffic, taking a walk, or even washing dishes.
Why Should You Care About Mindfulness?
As a Black Gen X woman, managing the stress of daily life, societal expectations, and midlife transitions can feel overwhelming. Whether it’s dealing with family dynamics, balancing your career, or simply coping with the changes that come with aging, practicing mindfulness can be a game changer.
Here are some key reasons mindfulness is important for managing anxiety and navigating midlife transitions:
Reason #1: It Helps Manage Anxiety
Mindfulness helps you tune into your thoughts and emotions without letting them spiral out of control. Instead of being overwhelmed by anxiety, you can learn to observe it, acknowledge it, and let it pass without reacting impulsively.Reason #2: It Enhances Emotional Well-being
Midlife transitions often bring up a lot of emotional baggage—whether it's unresolved childhood trauma, changing family roles, or health concerns. Mindfulness allows you to process these emotions without judgment, which can be incredibly healing.Reason #3: It Strengthens Relationships
As we get older, relationships become more complex, especially with family. Mindfulness can help you set healthy boundaries, improve communication, and be more present in your relationships—whether it's with your spouse, children, or aging parents.Reason #4: It Reduces Stress and Promotes Self-care
Listen, self-care is often the first thing to go when life gets busy. Mindfulness can act as a form of self-care by giving you a few moments to reconnect with yourself and recharge, even if it’s just for five minutes.
Want a tool to get you started? Download my free “Understanding the Thought-Emotion-Action Cycle workbook” for a great tool to enhance the mindfulness practice of observing your thoughts and feelings.
Mindfulness in Context
Let’s break it down further. How does mindfulness actually play out in real life? Here’s an example:
Tamika, a Black Gen X woman managing both a demanding career and a household, felt completely overwhelmed. Between managing work stress, supporting her aging parents, and dealing with her now young adult kids, her anxiety was off the charts. At the recommendation of her therapist, Tamika introduced mindfulness into her daily routine in small doses—starting with mindful breathing during her commute and ending with a short body scan meditation before bed.
After a few weeks, Tamika noticed she was less reactive to stress, more patient with her family, and even sleeping better. Mindfulness gave her the space to pause, reflect, and respond to challenges from a calmer, more grounded place.
Tips for Starting a Mindfulness Practice
If you're thinking, "Yeah, yeah, yeah, this all sounds great, but how do I actually get started?" — don’t worry, I’ve got you covered. Here are some easy ways to integrate mindfulness into your daily life:
Tip #1: Start Small
You don’t need to block out an hour a day to meditate. Start with just 5 minutes of mindful breathing in the morning or before bed. Focus on your breath as it moves in and out of your body. If your mind wanders (and it will), gently bring it back to your breath without judgment.Tip #2: Practice Mindful Eating
Eating is something we all do, but rarely do we pay full attention to it. Try practicing mindful eating by slowing down and really savoring each bite of food. Notice the texture, taste, and smell. This not only helps with digestion but can also make you more mindful in other areas of life.Tip #3: Use Mindfulness During Stressful Moments
When you feel overwhelmed, pause and take a few deep breaths. Notice how your body feels, what thoughts are coming up, and how you're reacting. This practice helps create a "pause" between the stressful event and your response, allowing you to act more thoughtfully.Tip #4: Incorporate Mindfulness into Everyday Tasks
Whether you're washing dishes, folding laundry, or walking the dog, use these moments as opportunities to practice mindfulness. Focus on the task at hand and try to stay fully present without letting your mind wander.
Explainer Video: Mindfulness in Action
Still unsure about how mindfulness fits into your life? Check out this great video on mindfulness that explains how simple mindfulness practices can reduce stress and improve mental health.
I especially like how the video emphasizes that mindfulness isn’t about eliminating stress altogether but learning how to manage it more effectively. A key point she makes in the video is “what you practice grows stronger”. Let that sink in for a sec. If angry outbursts, rumination and/or worry are commonplace. The more you engage in these things, the stronger these habits and behaviors become. DAYUM! BUT…….you can train your mind to create a new neural pathway….and with practice, shift from reacting in anger to responding with thoughtfulness.
So let’s wrap this thing up…..
Mindfulness is a powerful tool that can help you manage anxiety, improve your emotional well-being, and navigate the complexities of midlife with grace and patience. While it may take time to fully integrate mindfulness into your routine, the benefits are well worth the effort.
At Point and Pivot, I specialize in helping Black Gen X women navigate midlife transitions with mindfulness and anxiety management strategies that work.
If you’re in New Jersey and would like to explore therapy sessions, you can schedule a free consultation to learn how mindfulness can fit into your life.
Key Takeaways
Mindfulness is the practice of staying present and non-judgmentally observing your thoughts and feelings.
It’s rooted in ancient meditation practices but is backed by modern psychology as a way to manage anxiety, improve emotional well-being, and reduce stress.
Incorporating mindfulness into your daily routine can help you manage midlife transitions, improve relationships, and set healthy boundaries.
Let’s work together to bring more mindfulness into your life! Download my workbook or book a free consult to get started today.